My Gravity

That inexplicable gravitational pull. It's not love or choice...it exists beyond your permission, does without asking and ages not, over time space or separation. Fighting it is pointless as its torment is relentless. Obey it like a leaf to the wind and feel its magnitude take over your insides like 2 planets in a slow collide. That is you to me and me to you. It exists for us and we will listen to its inaudible commands. 
Give me you and take my soul. Us is ours.

Don't Call

There's that point when you've been hurt by someone and the anger starts to dissolve and you're human side wants to forgive.  So the anger turns to missing and the missing cries out in your soul.  It grabs your lips and makes you remember the kisses.  It cups your bosom and makes them ache for his hands.  You squeeze your thighs together and you remember how he filled your soul.
So you go and sit and stare at your phone, fingers itching to call...but don't....don't.

That spell was too big for the both of you, neither were you ready for it.  The passion drew you in and some truths were forgotten under the name of lust. He hurt you because that's the cost of choosing to be blind and you got hurt because you were too eager to feel again...don't call....don't call.

I know you want to fix it, go slow, ask more questions, but you don't get a full summer day in the middle of winter.  That fire burnt exactly the way it was supposed to burn and now it's out.  Staring at embers seeing his body on yours and smoke clouding your senses trying to feel something that you cannot repeat.  You lost yourself in passion and it's OK, gather yourself...don't call...don't call.

He's a wolf smitten and bitten, crawled in a cave to hide his pride and lick his wounds, leave him be. He danced like a gypsy in your love and he gave too, caught up in your rapture that you poured out like free rounds at a bar. You can't blame him for the love you fed him.  His wounds will be permanent scars and he will never forget and maybe never look for happiness again because your body haunts his eyes, the wind trickles your perfume in his nose, every time he warms up from the cold he will remember your arms, when the thunder claps he will remember your voice keeping him calm.  But he will also remember your tears, every time it rains, let him have his torment...don't call..don't call.

Let your heart bleed, the bleeping will stop.  Let your body ache, the aching will stop.  But if you call you're going to hurt yourself again because that fire burned exactly the way it was supposed to burn and burned out the way it needed to burn out.  It was good, it was fun and now it's over.

Don't call...don't call.

Little Faces

Hate

Sometimes feels like it should be our fate.

In a a country among the greatest of nations

We refuse to have the simplest of conversations

We fight and shot all the time

While those in charge are sitting too high.

Our bullets screams and tears can't reach them

Because they hold the keys and know we will bend.

Bend to feed our families 

And bend to protect those little faces.

Faces that just want to play 

But the old teach them what to say.  

Breeding value into color

Ruining everyone's summer

Kids can't play together

Because we've taught them to think about who is better.

Laughs never get to touch the air

Smiles never get to be born

But we've guaranteed they will be torn

Over something people who are dead have sworn.

Beliefs that mean nothing now 

While we shout "get in the car now!"

Ripping them from a new Black friend

Ripping them from a new Asian Friend

Ripping them from a new Middle Eastern Friend

Ripping them from a new White friend

That rip in their minds will never end.

Who do we feed when we hate

Who do we feed when we shoot

Who do we feed when we stab

Who do we feed when we kick

Kill the stories

Kill the lessons

Kill the ripping

Open their minds

Open their hands

Open their eyes

Give them the power that was already theirs waiting for them

Watch the beauty that will happen, if we all forgot color.

The Prince's Crown

I kiss my mother's feet 
She has walked the valley of shadows
With those feet she has aldo stood stead fast
Waiting for her champion.

I kiss my father's hands
He has fought for his place in this world
Lost and won but built his life
He continue to protect his queen.

I kiss my sister's forehead
her knowledge and guidance
Patience and peace
She gives to me in times of need.

I kiss my brother's shoulder
A fellow knight and shield on my right arm
To fight and Strive
sharing in the spoils of our endeavours.

I touch the crown of my head, I see my Kingdom.
I look at my shoulders, I know the weight I will need to bear.
I look at my hands, I know the fight they will be asked for.
I look at my feet, I know the faith and patience they are capable of.

Made from strength t so I am strength
Made from love so I possess it's inner core
Descendant of gods as it were
To carry the torch and pass it on.

Her Rock

I'll wait I'll wait I'll wait

Hold on, hold on, hold on.

don't do anything, don't change anything

She'll come back and it'llbe ok...just wait

Sit here, like the Rock of ages

Still and silent but smiling

Still and quiet...still, I'll be still.

For her.

Let the years pass, let the hopes pass, let the dreams pass

she is bigger

let the chances pass, let the offers pass, let the memories pass

she is worth more

I kneel covered in dust and stillness like a samurai in prayer

I will wait

She will come back, I know she will

Everyone changes their mind, right?

She will come back

she will remember that I'm here, she will.

Dust will turn to stone over my eyes

I will wait, she will feel it and come back

The ache in my knees bent for years will surge in her dreams.

The wind with carry messages from my dust to her ear

and tell her how much I miss her...right?

The vibration from my slow heartbeat 

will resound in her hands as she holds the steering wheel

The light will turn on from where she left dark and see me

and she will come back...right?

Altar

Your whirlwind into my life then you disappear

And Just when I'm picking up the pieces off the ground you bring an earthquake and swallow them up.

Just when my tears start to fall you bring a monsoon and drown me.

I look up to ask God why and you scorch the sky with a hurricane.

I seek comfort to regain strength and erupt a volcano and burn my inner piece with lava.

You strip me, you take from me, you leave me bare and broken

I didn't know looking in your eyes was going to be an apocalypse.

There's nothing I relied on still intact, 

Shield and spare lost in the waves...of you.

But it was what you required

It was what you needed

The love you were about to give needed me to walk away from everything before I met you.

You needed me exposed, you needed me vulnerable.

Something so powerful yet fragile at the same time.

But your request was simple...me and nothing else.

I let your whirlwind in, 

I nodded to your earthquake, 

I stepped aside for your monsoon and 

I sacrificed my peace in your fire

What you showed me you were giving me

The price is understood

The price is paid.

I am delivered.

We all feel

The pastor that asked his wife for a threesome
The con artist that finally asked for forgiveness
The bullet that finally got permission
At some point, we all feel

The hard man that finally broke into tears
The high school popular girl that gave away her crown
The rich lady that left her coat for the sleeping homeless man
At some point, we all give

The hunted meal finally clutched
The moment you chose to awaken your soul
The sleepless nights preparing
At some point, we all take

The dreams that never stop
Those moments we get lost in a hope
Sights that pull our groins and drown our tongues
At some point, we all want.

We build a world based on rules and borders
While we dream of being the lion and the eagle
We exchange pleasantries in our suits
When all we want is to sink our teeth in our passions

Living the daily fight between what you want and what you need
Set to carry equal value under free will in a world of rules.
We can define and organize and require.
In the end, we all feel.

Flutter

I've chased her for years
She changed her face, her color, her hair, her skin
Everytime I think I've found her, she dashes off
But each time instead happy giggles of a friendly chase
It's tears and heartbreak.

The Experiment

Lay in my hollow
Feel my emptiness swallow you
My darkness gouging your eyes
Silence screaming in your ears

My hands seep inside your veins, up your lungs...cold
Your gasp feeds me, your fright fills me
The terror in your eyes are my joy
This is my freedom, my prison.

I take when I want to give
Replaying the scene over and over,
Trying to get it right, the way she did it...to me.
She did it so perfectly an I must know how.

So I become her, over and over again.
Test after test, heart after heart, I plant the fatal stab
But I can't seem to walk away, guilt free..like she did.

Take 16, take, 30, take 42...action!!!
Flawless falling, but I can't walk away smiling...like she did, to me.
How did she do it, I must know.
Get a new test, make her fall and do it again.

Maybe I need to make them fall, faster, deeper, like I did?
Maybe I need to be their sun and moon, like she was to me?
Maybe they need to feel like they'd die, like I did?
Maybe the harder they fall, will make it easier to drop them and walk away?..like she did.

Maybe this is my Sisyphus. 
Forever trying to understand how she could walk away
From the one thing I breathed for, the one thing that truly made me feel alive.

Day after day, each boulder a new heart, a new test,
But never the answer, as I loop without knowing.
Looping, yet a forever thirst.
My prison, my experiment, my prison,...

Broken Cage

The overdone football comments when we spoke.  The bro laugh even when I didn't say anything really funny.  The questions where the answer was then seemingly obvious, but the staggered stare was the only thing mutual.  I rushed in late that morning, but it was just us still due to the weather.  Still getting settled I decided to hit the restroom before I hunker in for the day's lull. An empty corridor echoes my shoes along the walls, my own fans cheering me on in its reverb, today will be a good day I said. The clean bathroom with its cold stiff unused air ready to be the conveyer belt of relief for the day welcomed me with a nod as the door swung shut behind me, the urinal with its porcelain innocence, a standing throne in its own right awaited my service. 
The silence broke as the door swung open, a sound that shouldn't even mean anything on a normal basis, this morning sent a shiver down my spine as the only other person who could have walked in, was him.  Steps you should hear as someone walks to another urinal didn't echo as they should.  Instead, a shiver ran down my spine as without turning around I realised the steps were absent because he was now standing behind me. Shivers ran down my spine and over my ears and my skull, in surprise, in fright and in anticipation.  
A tension that I've been hiding for years poured down as I exhaled the smell of his cologne. I leaned my head down as his left hand calmly grasped the nape of my neck only to see my member that I had pulled out to urinate turned into a swollen pulsation.  He stepped in closer and his breath on the back of my neck now was like fire against the chill of my shivers still playing in anticipation like waiting turn in double dutch. 
My ignorance was present, so in fear of making a fool of myself I placed both hands on the wall over the top of the urinal like a criminal about to get searched by a cop.  The relief breath I just breathed from all this hiding now picked up speed as his right hand glided around my side and grabbed it.  Before he moved me, he leaned in and bit the open side of my neck with the mouth that laughed at my corny jokes and asked me obvious questions...now igniting a secret. Slowly gliding me with his right hand, he went faster. My head spun, and time slowed like a witch casting a spell.  I could feel the swirls in the air.  I open my eyes to see his gold college ring on his finger, shiney going back and forth contrasting against the porcelain white background.
An explosion of my body in that moment was like a tiger restrained for years made to live one way... made to love her... made to raise them, now feeling the bars break open and the hot pieces of iron bouncing off me in this baptism.  Now free to finally breathe and walk and talk, they way I want to, the way I've been dying to.  As I caught my breath, he let go and walked out, his shoes echoing down the hall until the door swung shut again leaving me to my silent kingdom and I stood there looking down at a new me out of breath and rebirthed.  A hunger allowed to be hungry, a thirst that has now been offered the drink, a new me walked back to my desk.